The $600 solution

Suppose you are covered in bruises because you keep getting hit by someone.  Now suppose further that the person that keeps hitting you proposes a way to alleviate your suffering.  Instead of hitting you with his fists, he’s going to pick a fresh spot somewhere on your body and hit you with someone else’s fist.  

If this doesn’t sound ridiculous enough, suppose that the person hitting you expects you to be happy about this way to alleviate your suffering.  Imagine even further that you are happy about it. 

After thinking about it for several hours, this is what I’ve come to call the $600 solution.  I’m referring to the $600 bonus check that will start being delivered on Monday.  “But Mister Baatard,” you might be saying, “the government is giving us money!  That’s good, right?”

Uh, no.  My people, this disbursement is but the latest in a long line of wounds inflicted on our economy.  It’s bad enough that the dollar is devaluing, gas prices are through the roof, layoffs and downsizing continue unabated, the housing market is about to take a crap, and there’s a world-wide food shortage (using up all our to corn make ethanol instead of drilling in ANWR is brilliant).  These conditions all seem to feed on each other, exacerbating the problem.  

So what does the federal government do about it?  Do they implement a solution to lower gas prices, like build more refineries or cut back on gas taxes?  Nope.  Do they cut back on tax breaks given to companies that outsource overseas?  Uh-uh.  Does anybody put any ideas on the table for stimulating job growth?  Forget it.

In fact, a long-term solution isn’t even proposed.  What is done to kick start the economy?  We borrow money from China to give to U.S. citizens.  

Yeah, how many of you sitting at home greedily awaiting your checks knew that we borrowed that money from China?  These checks aren’t our tax dollars being returned to us.  This isn’t a refund.  This is the federal government going to China with hat in hand begging for money.  China loans it to us, thereby increasing our debt.  Then that money is going to be given to us, and for what?  They actually want us to go out and spend it?  

This raises several questions, at least with me.  What economic problem is this measure going to solve?  How will this actually help the economy in the long term?  Does the government expect an infusion of foreign cash to set about a chain of events that will strengthen our economy?  And what happens when everyone has gone out and spent their money?  

Retailers are offering discounts on high-dollar items in anticipation of this disbursement.  They will sell items normally out of the price range of consumers for the exact amount of the check.  So what, the poor in America will have HD TVs?  Yeah, I can’t get a good job, afford gas, pay for medical care, or feed my family, but I can watch Nascar the way it was intended to be viewed!    

Our government has just made our economic situation that much more dire, and they are patting themselves on the back!  Ask yourselves this:  How does this scheme actually help?  It’s increased our national debt.  Is that helpful?  It’s devalued the dollar even more.  Is that helpful?  It’s set a dangerous precedent with Americans who will now clamor for more “free” money once they’ve blown this check.  Is that helpful?

The $600 solution is nothing of the sort.  How about helping us save $600 on the cost of gas every year?  How about finding ways to shave $600 off the cost of shipping consumer goods?  How about finding a way to lower healthcare costs or college tuition by $600?  

Maybe a better analogy would be a junkie in dire need of rehab getting drugs from a different dealer and being told that this latest fix is a way to get themselves clean.